New soul

I have grown up over the years by becoming less "matured" in my thinking - by thinking less and worrying less about everything else. Something that has took away the aggressiveness that I used to have towards things, towards people and towards myself. Something that has taught me to free myself of tension and anxiety, to ignore when needed to, and to forget as and when.

A freedom that has no no doubt relieved me of stress.

An ignorance that has rid me of my high aims and ambitions.

A forgetfulness that has made me moved on in life.

Contented as I am, I have no regrets. It is a trade off between a tense and high-flying success in the social ladder or a relaxed and fair level of achievement in the social setting. Would I happier if I have chosen the former? I have yet to think back.

In the jukebox: New Soul, Yael Naim

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit about how to give and take
But since I came here ,felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la...

I'm a young soul
In this very strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit about what is true and fake
But why all this hate? Try to communicate
finding just that love is not always easy to make

la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la...

This is a happy end
Cause' you don't understand
Everything you have done
Why's everything so wrong

This is a happy end
Come and give me your hand
I'll take your far away

I'm a new soul I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit about how to give and take
But since I came here felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la...

la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la....


"... a worse mood helped to focus people's attention on their surroundings and led to a more thorough and careful thinking style, while happiness tended to reduce focus and increase both confidence and forgetfulness." - Forgas

"much of our life is built on the hope for tomorrow yet tomorrow brings us closer to death and is the ultimate enemy; people live as if they didn't know about the certainty of death; once stripped of its common romanticisms, the world is a foreign, strange and inhuman place." - Albert Camus

Time is a limit

A quarter of the year went past. Life is looking good or at least, adequate; a balance between work, friends and myself.

It strikes me that how little and precious memories are with the days and months that have gone by. Life goes on every second, every minute, every hour. With every second and minute that we spent waiting, hesitating makes me wonder how much we might have missed.

I want to get rid of the lethargy that builds up after a tiring day - whatever the day is spent on - and to re-awake every minute for something new.

Life is worth waking up for; for things that await life - and not for life to await.

Three quarters of the year remain which I believe will pass by in a flash. We can choose to sit and watch as seconds and minutes tick away. Or we can choose to say "Yes" this second to whatever that comes like an experience - good or bad - that we can add to our memory bank.

There are so much out there that I have not seen, heard, smelt, felt or touched.

But I only have this lifetime to experience the most that I can.

One lifetime to make the best out of.

Les rêves

"Parlez des rêves et sortez cent mots que tu peux associer aux rêves", le professeur m'a demandé. Pourquoi je trouve ça si difficile? Est-ce que c'est bizzare pour quelq'un qui croit à suivre les rêves d'avoir difficultés d'exprimer ses rêves? Oui, vraiment. Je me déçois. Une suprise. Vraiment.

Je suis bloqué dans ma téte. Est-ce que je suis perdue après tous ce que j'ai fait pour moi?

Et pourquoi c'est comme ça?

Je suis contente, heureuse mais pourquoi ce n'est pas suffisant?

Est-ce que je cherche ou j'ai besoin de quelque chose que je ne sais pas avant?