insane

It's surprising how far things have gone within a short frame of time.

Incident after incident left me feeling a lack of peace and more and more insecure. Suddenly, the vision turns blur and I am thrown in this maze... stuck at the crossroads of three routes. I am fortunate to still have the liberty of choice but as I approach the turning point, it begins to seem that each of the routes ahead of me are just blurry images. I can't help but to wonder if these are all real. I could go on the way I was heading to but I no longer have the same drive that I had before, too many things have happened that make me lost faith, direction and the intuition to go on. I had wished for the other route to take me out of where I am, momentarily, and experience a whole new dimension even if it doesn't last long. Or possibly, explore a new route that might not promise the same adventures that I have had in my earlier journey.

All these thoughts are running wild in my head like a madman chasing nothing. So random, so irregular, so senseless.

This state of frenzy agitates the molecules in my head, angers and frustrates me.

I couldn't think straight. I didn't know what to do and what will come next.

The diminishing sense of motivation and conviction drives me mad.

Where am I heading to? What shall I do?

So many thoughts but only one will stay.

I feel like breaking away from all these nonsensical folie... to regain the peace of mind that I need.