a puzzle piece

Girls fall in love.

All girls do...

just in a different manner, of course.

Written in my previous entry, I'm not succumbed to having just a temporary puzzle piece that happens to fit in at that moment in time. No temporary remedies. No desperation. No temptation to being in a relationship just for the sake of being in one.

Loneliness or singlehood doesn't seem like a bad idea to me at all.

I try to imagine myself being just a little different... trying to fit in a temporary puzzle but it just doesn't work. Perhaps my own set of puzzle feels so complete right now that a temporary piece is just... redundant.

I sat in a cafe, sharing and chatting with a friend about girls being in love. Why do I see friends trying to fill up their puzzle so deperately like they just can't be alone? Is it emptiness from the gap that was left behind by the previous? Like a hollow in the sand, evident of a former presence, signaling its absence and craving for another presence. Nothing can ever replace it so perfectly like the first, or so I thought.

For me, my puzzle has always been untouched... so complete that I can't even feel if anything is wrong.

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Can I be the girl-next-door? She, being just an ordinary and simple figure, falling in love like what every girl does. She, who goes along with the flow, love and hate as she wants to.

She, the one that all guys find approachable and endearing. She, whom guys crave for and wish to shower with love and attention.

"Unlike the femme fatale, the girl next door does not have hidden plans of her own, because her character and personality are open and straightforward, and because her intentions do not need to be concealed... The girl next door is always physically in close range..." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Girl_next_door)


Still trying to find the girl-next-door within...

One day when I can learn to let go, not hold back... and go on with the flow...

taking it nice and slow

Six days into the new year and everything feels so similar and yet so different.

It's going to be a year of difficulty and also a year of opportunity... hopefully the latter outweighs the former.

To embrace an opportunity takes courage and effort. Am I ready to embrace them?

To seek courage for comfort, we seek them in numbers, like in a group. To find new courage, it takes only one, yourself.

At least, I tried to creak my door open... the light outside is too bright for me to take in all at one time. I'm learning to take things step-by-step, one at a time... just nice, and slow.

Breathe in, breathe out...

True to what the folks say, you'll find light seeping through your door if you open your door. If you don't, you never know the light is just outside. I've been in my own room for the longest time. And, still enjoying it. It's not easy to open the door as it's not easy for me to share my life with a stranger. Like I'd told a friend, I've forgotten how to share... like biting into the same pie with someone, drinking from the same straw or simply holding hands and sharing a hug.

It's going to be overwhelming year, as I have sensed... For now, I'm keeping the cool and staying calm.