a time of nothing

Time has frozen for my over-reactive brain cells which are ever scrutinising and questioning reality, and fantasizing about endless possibilities.

It has been a quiet time; a time of nothing... no extreme negativity nor optimism.

For me, I have gone into hibernation – a much better word to describe then to refer myself as hiding away from my ever-distracted thoughts cos the latter seems to suggest intentional avoidance, dishonesty and refusal to follow one’s truest self. I will not admit to the latter as I am trying very much to stay rooted to one place, one thought, and one possibility – like what everyone else can do.

Commitment may very well seem like my greatest phobia though fickle-mindedness is not my forte. Explain my memory lapse – forgetting which mug I was using the next second after I put it down, confirming details and writing them on paper which never register into my memory bank, and failing to recall what I did on x’mas just a week after. Selective memory or what I say, my special way of relieving burdens. Writing negative thoughts down as soon as they came, and I left them there; like passing batons, it was as though they weren’t there in the first place.